Lugianna (lugianna) wrote in i_am_a_twin,

I believe I am a twin whos twin died befire being born...


I am feeling more and morew the ned to talk to someone who might understand whatI am going through. Please read throught my post before dismissing it or condemning mer or telling me to go away, or even befoire believing me

My mother was, herself, a non-identical twein whose brother was stuillborn. Non-identical twin females often have a mother that ovulated twice (one from each ovaryt) a condition that is thought to be henetioc, but because it relates to the female oart of reproduction, is only carried and expressed by the females.
My mothertold me, thar although my birthweight was within normal (5lbs) when I was birthed, they filled two larhe buckets with the amniotic fluidsd from my mothers womb.
A midwife told my mother that she had twins by feel. She had been right on numerous occasions

I have heard that around 50% of pregnancies start as twins, but then one twin dies, and is reabsorbed by either thesurviving twin, or the mother - the so-called 'disappearing twin' syndrome. (the 50% is calculated after taking out KNOWN cases of one twin being miscarried.)

Add in the non-scientific fact that I feel incomplete, have always imagined a twin who can understand what I am,something if me. and I can;t help but wonder.
I asked my mother, who as soon as I mention it, refuses to talk abnout it. She miscarried her first child, an older sib, so I cant help wonder if she's scared to believe (because she diesn't want to believe she might have lost another child) or because, she knows something that she refuses to tell. The odd thing is that she'll talk about Ruth (her prem who died a few hours after birth) but cuts me off with an angry enial if I try to ask about the possibility of being a twin.

Persionally, her reaction seems over-extreme to me, but then, maybe I'm reading more into it than I sholuld.

If you think I'm here for there wrong readons, that I'm pretentious or self-deluded, please tell me, and I'll go, but I am at my wits end with wondering and keeping my thoughts to myself.



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